In Memory of Åsa Bäcklund

Many in the SWC were deeply saddened by the sudden death of one of our long time members and I'm no different. I was stunned at the news. Åsa was a beautiful person and one that I feel fortunate enough to have shared emails with and to work with when she was a HC member. Her posts were a joy to read as she was so vibrant and so interesting. I enjoyed reading all about her beloved Sweden, her daughter and her husband and other members of her family. Her emails were so positive and many were filled with smiles and LOLs. She loved to write on politics and history and she knew her stuff.:-) Åsa joined the SWC in 1999. She was a member of the Hospitality Committee until she had to resign because of both illness and computer problems. She will be missed.

Cathy Hilden
Minnesota

I am in total shock! I was just getting ready to write about the EU going kaput with its signing of the constitution. Now we lost a link. Of course, that's not what saddens us, what saddens us is the loss of Åsa. Her body may be gone from us but her spirits and friendship will never be lost!!

We know Åsa's family so well; Åsa had talked so lovingly of them often. She raved about her sister's generosity and love for her.

As a Chinese member of this club, I had so enjoyed her stories about her Chinese friends across the street from her. I will forever miss her and her stories!!

Ling Elkins
Novato, California

As I write this right now, my heart is so sad and I feel the emotions overcoming me of knowing that I will never hear from Åsa again by e-mail.

Asa's e-mails to the SayWhatClub and personally to me have always been on a positive note. How I would have loved to have met her and seen her country.. She truly must have been a very sweet person who didn't have a unkind thought to anyone. My heart and prayers go out to the whole family, especially to husband and young daughter.

May God be with Åsa's family during this most difficult time of their lives.

Shari Steele
Illinois USA

How my heart goes out to Erica in her suffering and bereavement, and to Dan and Anna, and all members of what was and is a close family. Her news was devastating, here, and I had to read several times before accepting that this was true, and final. It is still difficult to imagine this list, with no more Åsa, popping in from time to time and rejoicing to be back. Once, several years back, on our Vistas list, one of several she belonged to on our SayWhatClub, folks decided she needed cheering, and our own Sharlene, from Australia, established a website on which we could post our messages to her. I remember how thrilled she was, in terms of the thoughts expressed.

I remember Åsa talking of a large, extended family, and memories of rural childhood, with aunts and uncles during long idyllic summer holidays - haywagons and 'harvests home'. I remember her, too, talking of a large gathering of friends, and of the traditional fishy dish they loved. She said that we would probably wrinkle up our noses in horror, but she described it, nevertheless.

I remember Åsa, with her broken hip, and the pain she experienced as replacements were effected, and the desired result was not obtained. I remember our rejoicing, when, finally, she walked again.

Åsa read copiously, of politico-historical literature, and I remember her sharing of this, and her conclusions drawn. We didn't always agree with her, but, by gum, we revelled in the debates she provoked. This is just one more of the facets of Åsa, to us.

Åsa always and in almost every message to us, affirmed her 'oneness' with young Anna, and her joy in the child. This young girl is approaching teenage now, I think. I can't think how her loss of her mother and dearest friend is going to affect her. I figure a strong family will be doubly strong, for Anna. Thank heaven she has this support group, which many of us lack. Åsa established groups of friends, wherever she went, and wherever she went on the internet, too. We were privileged to have known this sterling woman, and to have loved her, and to have loved her influence on us all.

May she rest in peace.

Patsi Schuhmann
South Africa

To Åsa:

As a great shock came to me the message of your sudden departure. Too soon you left this world, that you wanted to explore with the depth of your soul. You were always eager to learn. Your disabilities you carried with grace, and a smile on your face to give others support where it was needed.

Our special friendship, I cherished. You will be greatly missed, not only by your own family, but also by this extended family - the "Say What Club".

May you rest in peace.
In Loving Memory,

Edeltraut Schleffler-Plath
Canada

My wife Helen and I had the pleasure of meeting Åsa Bäcklund at the SWC gathering in Amsterdam in '02 so it was a shock to learn of her unexpected death from her sister. In the exchange of emails running up to the con date, we learned that Åsa had to make a special effort to join us from her home in northern Sweden. Cost was a factor but her family was enormously supportive of her need to spread her wings and money was found for the air fare. There were worries that the narcotic pain killers she depended on would be a problem at airport security. Åsa expressed concern about the cost of getting around in her wheel chair; since public transportation was impractical, we took turns pushing her chair on excursions from the hotel and the indispensable Arthur would always have a limousine on hand for extended trips.

Ron Mitchell
Seattle

I am not really all here now. I knew Åsa personally. I had the privilege of meeting her in Amsterdam at the Euro Con. This has really hit me hard.

I saw Åsa wheel her wheel chair into the RHO hotel with her luggage. I was sitting nearby, and knew her immediately. During the week of that Con, I learned to not only love Åsa, but admire her ability to live life to its fullest. She had lost her crutches at the airport, (sometimes she could use the crutches and not have to use the Wheel Chair.) Åsa took care of herself. She did not ask for help. She was in Amsterdam to meet as many of the SayWhatClub friends she could meet. She was ill at times and had to stay at the hotel, but when she was feeling better, she joined us.

I saw Åsa off to the airport as she left the hotel, and I wondered if I would ever see her again.

Maurice Wilson

I only knew Åsa through her words; her posts were always chock full of life and light. The word was her gentle sword, always unsheathed ready to defend her beliefs and the rights of others.

Suddenly she is gone for good; I can’t believe it!

I will so miss her laughter.

Irene Pike
Port Hope, Ontario, Canada

Åsa was a rare gem among the few. She was fearless! She spoke her mind and spoke it well without intimidation, without prejudice, without flaws. May she rest in peace and may the heavens realize how lucky they are to have her as their own.

Pearl Feder

I have tears in my eyes, writing this. I loved Åsa so very much, even through I never had the pleasure of meeting her. I was dating a Swedish widower, and told her all about it. Also, because I am Jewish, she had asked me many questions to learn more about them as she had only known one of them when she was growing up I think. I also had a total hip replacement when I was 26 years old, and 3 total hip revisions, and 6 dislocations, which we discussed too. I tried to have the doctor do a minor surgery and I also ended up with a staph infection! I remember hers well, and all her anguish with this, and waiting in pain in the hospital, and doctors not helping her. I am sure these things helped shorten her years with us, unfortunately! I am so very sad as I would imagine many others of us here are too.

Sandi Enfield

Friends,

We have truly lost a valuable friend. I have a real hard time dealing with the fact that Åsa is no longer with us. I first met Åsa when she and I started on the SWC hospitality committee the same week, and went through the training together..That was over five years ago. We emailed back and forth over the years and even exchanged cards via snail mail.

Åsa was a fighter. She overcame so many illnesses and the greatest being her hip. For a while she was stuck in a wheelchair and could not walk. We all rejoiced when she was able to walk again. Through her emails I saw she was doing better though she constantly had problems with her computer connection. I would pray we would hear from her soon.

So at this time of grieving for this special friend who, even when she was sick, would support her friends. When she was online, she would be the first person to welcome a newbie.

Åsa has been off the HC for a few years now so some of the newer members may not know her. But she was an inspiration to all. And will be dearly missed. But now Åsa is at rest and no more pains and no more hearing loss.

Now Åsa is our angel watching over all of us

Martha Mattox

I am deeply saddened that our most prolific writer and friend to our list will no longer educate and amuse us with her posts. Åsa has been such a big part of the SWC Global list and she brought to us a description of her Sweden that was far better than any book I could read.

Åsa was Sweden and now that she is silenced I will forever think of Sweden only in terms of this dear person who lived and loved so deeply.

With much respect and love,

Suzanne Gossett
North Arlington, New Jersey, USA

I haven't corresponded with Åsa in well over a year, but I am in tears over her passing. She and I were kindred spirits - we never met face-to-face but shared a closeness that's hard to describe. I have no doubt she's thought of me from time to time, as I have thought of her. We both had very similar hearing loss experiences, becoming deaf over a relatively short period of time. We both were diagnosed with diabetes. We struggled together for quite a while. When Åsa got her implant and was successful with it we sort of drifted apart, as she also had so many other health problems at the time and was often away from her email. I was going to school and swamped with work as well.

I do not mean to ramble. Åsa and I knew each other and were there for each other at a time in our lives that was so painful - when we were becoming deaf. I am sorry we never met in person. I am grateful we met through words.

I will think of her for the rest of my life with fondness. She will be missed.

Jane Schlau
New York (former SWC member)

I woke up this morning, after being away from my computer for just one day, to find the most devastating news I could ever imagine.To learn that Åsa, had passed away in her sleep tore my very heart out. She was such a dear person to me, and all of the members of the SWC lists she belonged to. How much she will be missed, words can never express. Some tragedies find a resting place, in our hearts. For me this one never will.

On a personal level, Åsa and I had a very deep friendship, as we corresponded privately for some time. Her knowledge about almost every subject that came up was enormous. What she did not know much about she researched and came back online with a clear and definitive explanation about the subject. Quite often she referred me to writings I was delighted to read about. She was an outspoken advocate of respect for all people no matter who they were, or from where they came. She was a citizen of Sweden, but to me she was one of all countries. She was a friend to people of all ages, and this seventy-five year old senior can attest to that.

Åsa, brought new meaning for me, to the expression, "Whenever you lose, remember the lesson." It was one of the reasons why I have come to a better understanding of the fact that losing is not as shameful as I have always believed it to be. Not trying is truly what bears that shame.

I am an African American member of the SWC, who learned so much about Sweden from Åsa, it took my breath away. I knew precious little about Sweden, before meeting her, on line. And I had hoped the future would allow me a chance to see the face of the person who gave it life to me.Åsa, and I had a special bond, across the miles, that will never be broken even by her passing.

She spoke so tenderly of her husband, her sister, her mom, and dad, family and friends, of Sweden, and of her greatest treasure, her daughter Anna. Even at her tender age, Anna will have golden memories of a mother who loved
her so very much. It was difficult, at times, to believe we really did not know all of these people in person. For in her own inimitable way, Åsa introduced them to us, one by one.

Åsa's knowledge of world history was remarkable. She sparked interests in me, and in others, with each of her posts. She was the best "Tell it like it is," person, I have ever known. Only special people are born to touch so many lives. And now feeling privileged to have known her, in writing, sadly I can not tell her so today. Just knowing Åsa, I really believe, in her heart she knew my feelings for a long time.

I have many loved ones to unite with in the hereafter, and some who I will meet for the first time, dearest Åsa will be one of them. My imagination goes wild at times, and I am not ashamed to say it here. I know by now, she has met my own mother and they are friends.

In closing, I would like to extend my prayers and deepest sympathies to Åsa's very close family. I have included the words of a lovely song that, in my heart, I believe is the way Åsa, given the choice by the angel who came for her, would have selected to leave this world, and did.:

Softly I will leave you

Softly, I will leave you softly
For my heart would break if you should wake and see me go
So I leave you softly, long before you miss me
Long before your arms can beg me stay
For one more hour or one more day
After all the years, I can’t bear the tears to fall
So, softly as I leave you there

(softly, long before you kiss me)
(long before your arms can beg me stay)
(for one more hour) or one more day
After all the years, I can’t bear the tears to fall
So, softly as I leave you there
As I leave I you there
As I leave I you there

Written by Hal Shaper, Antonio Devita, Giorgio Calabrese

With tenderness, and love.

Elsie Morgan
Los Angeles, California

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